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CrossingTheJungle

We pick up where we left off, in the jungle surrounded by a troop of monkeys in the trees fleeing the fire the party recently set. For some reason the monkeys smell of gold.

Do we proceed to:

1. Shoot the monkeys and loot the gold
2. ignore the monkeys and wallow in a puddle of water as a crab
3. abandon the entire area and walk off without a map or a compass into the jungle
4. all of the above?

If you said "all of the above" you are correct

After a lot of survival rolls, climbing trees, falling out of trees, wandering around in circles, having Dues ex Machine from the hags get the party back together again, sending RATS after the party to direct others, we eventually found a river marked on the map and a small rotting bridge.

The obvious choice is send across the largest, heaviest party member holding only one backup rope which is not tied to anything. Obviously the bridge fails and Cells descent into the hell of bad dice rolls begins.

Noticing an android submerged in the river below (after he falls in) we have a bit of of a game of a tug of war as the party tries to save Cell and he attempts not to be saved. Eventually cooler (and wet) minds prevail and we reach the far side of the shore but the android body must remain where it is, deep in the depths of a fast flowing river.

Now remembering that apparently Tony always fails his Survival rolls we decide NOT to follow him for a change and instead follow those with better chances of success and find another marker on the map, a deserted village.

Turns out the local blood sucker wildlife is rampant here Tony decides to stand in the middle of the water and allow himself being eater by a lots of little nasties, where his endless flowing of blood awakens a larger blood sucker eager for lunch soon after.

At this point it turns out Cell is the EPITOME of a mosquito magnet as everything that can suck blood, rushed over to him and does so. Calculations show approximately 315% of his fluids were recycled through the kidneys of various wild monsters over the next few battles. Tony had a bit of a challenge keeping him topped up. But we prevailed and discovered the well in the center of the village had a ladder in it and we investigate (Fletcher noticed this we entire party was instead about to track out towards the end point across the "Swamp of Slow, Certain and Painful Death. (tm)"

And into a cave that lights up as soon as the party enters. Cell rushes in in alone despite having dice that can't roll a anything other than a "miss" if his life depended on it. Unrelated note, his life depended on it.

More bloodsuckers and explosive fungi swarm the incautious party and Cell is drained of every drop, falling at the end to a single extra point of poison damage AFTER the monsters are vanquished so we push on and discover the goal, a ship abandoned somehow in the middle of a massive swap, miles from any water. Around them is a eary silence and Styx (who turns up lead in by a few local rat folk who seem extremely nervous of him) smells living death on the air.

Perhaps now is the time for a rest and to check our equipment